A NEW ENTERLUDE CALLED
THERSITES
Thys enterlude folowynge doth declare howe that the greatest boesters are not the greatest doers.
12–24 October 1537
a synoptic, alphabetical character list
MATER
Thersites's mother. When Thersites is decked out in his new armor, he boasts of his future heroic exploits to her. Although fearing he will attack her, Mater tries to persuade him not to leave home. He mocks her to the audience. Later, Thersites hides amongst her skirts when he runs from the soldier, Miles. When Ulysses sends his son to Thersites, asking him to get his mother to cure him of worms, she at first refuses but Thersites bullies her into curing Telemachus, a cure she effects using comically elaborate spells.
MILES
A soldier. He first appears waiting for Thersites to complete his fight with a snail. When he considers the snail vanquished, Thersites threatens Miles, but when Miles rebuffs the attack, Thersites flees to his mother. Miles appears at the end of the play to point out that a barking dog does not always bite, and to offer a prayer to the king [Henry VIII], his wife, Jane [Seymour], and her baby son [Edward].
MULCIBER
The armorer to the gods, working (according the stage directions) from a shop made onstage. He is bullied by Thersites into providing him with an armor and sword, after much arguing about whether Thersites wants a sallet (helmet) or sallet (salad).
SNAIL
The snail does not speak. He is present onstage, and Thersites fights him. When the Snail pulls his horns in, Thersites is delighted with his victory, his only one in the play.
TELEMACHUS
Young son of Ulysses, sent by his father to be cured of the worms by Thersites's mother.
THERSITES
Appears first nearly naked, with a club, having just left the siege of Troy. He boasts of all the Greek, Arthurian, and biblical heroes that he has terrified or will terrify. He bullies Mulciber the blacksmith into making him a full suit of armor (after they have argued about whether he wants a sallet–which means either a helmet or salad). Later he mocks his mother behind her back. He fights a snail with retractable horns (his only victory), and threatens and then runs from the soldier (Miles) and hides amongst his mother's skirts. He bullies his mother into healing the young son of his old enemy, Ulysses. Finally, after another bout of boasting, the play ends with his being chased away by the soldier.
ULYSSES
A "ghost character." Ulysses sends a letter with his young son, Telemachus, apologizing for his hostile treatment of Thersites, presumably during the war at Troy, and asking Thersites to persuade his mother (Mater), to cure Telemachus of worms.