I.i Matthew Merygreeke enters and tells us about his friend Ralph Roister Doister. Doister is a braggart and a Petrarchan lover, always about to die for the love of some woman he has just met. Because of Doister's high self-opinion he is susceptible to flattery. Hence, Merygreeke has a grand time twisting Doister around his finger with flattery. Doister, of course, believes Merygreeke is his very good friend.

I.ii finds Doister accosting Merygreeke. Doister has fallen in love with Christian Custance (whose name he cannot initially remember). He wants her for his wife or else he will "runne madde." The problem is that she is already promised to Gawyn Goodlucke, a prosperous merchant who is presently away on business. Merygreeke flatters Doister greatly and swears to help him get Custance. The whole thing, of course, is a lark to Merygreeke who loves to get Doister into tight places in order to watch him squirm. Merygreeke leaves to fetch minstrels so that Doister might serenade Custance.

I.iii finds Doister eavesdropping upon Custance's maids-Mage Mumblecrust, Tibet Talkapace, and Annot Alyface. Each is doing a household chore (spinning on a distaff, sewing, and knitting, respectively). The women engage in bawdy talk while Doister, listening, is all the more certain he wants Custance for wife-a woman who would employ such servants! The women sing and soon discover Doister eavesdropping. Doister kisses old Mumblecrust, and she is his servant. Talkapace refuses to be kissed. Mumblecrust promises to take a message to her mistress for Doister, but Doister refuses to tell her his name. Doister whispers in Mumblecrust's ear what she is to tell Custance.

I.iv finds Merygreeke and the minstrels-Doister's servants-entering and seeing Doister whispering to Mumblecrust. Dobinet Doughty thinks Mumblecrust is the intended quarry of Doister and compliments him on her-though she is obviously an old lady. Merygreeke glorifies Doister (some horrible tall tales) for Mumblecrust's edification, then beats Doister under the guise of brushing lint from his coat. Doister gives Mumblecrust a letter to deliver to Custance, swearing he wrote it himself. He promises that the worst kitchen wench will be treated like nobility if he should become master of Custance's house. Mumblecrust is all too eager to forward his position with her lady.

In I.v Mumblecrust gives Custance the letter. Mumblecrust angers Custance by not being able to tell who sent her the letter, the gentleman not having left his name. Custance swears she will be true to her promise to Gawyn Goodlucke and tells Mumblecrust, under pain of punishment, "bring mee no mo letters for no man's pleasure, / But you know from whom [it comes]."

II.i begins the next morning. Doughty is delivering a present to Custance. He speaks of Doister's typical ardor in such times of passion-he's been through it all before-apparently many times.

II.ii finds Mumblecrust meeting Doughty. Doughty asks her to deliver the gift from his master to Custance. But Mumblecrust will not because she has already been scolded once for such service. Truepenny (another of Custance's servants) enters.

II.iii begins with Truepenny's first lines. Doughty pretends to have lost something-or be looking for a house on the street and paying no attention to Truepenny. It is a ruse to lure Truepenny into conversation without her suspecting that Doughty really wants a favor. The plan works. Doughty informs Truepenny that he is the servant of the man Custance is to marry. Truepenny mistakes him, thinking he means Gawyn Goodlucke, and promises to deliver the gift. Talkapace and Alyface enter. Truepenny introduces Doughty to them as the "Servant to hym that must be our mistresse husbande." They are happy to meet Doughty and sing. Doughty delivers the gift, a ring, and Talkapace takes it for Custance.

II.iv The ring is delivered to Custance. Custance is annoyed at receiving another gift from her secret admirer, scolds Talkapace for bringing it, and sends Truepenny out to catch Doughty and bring him to her. Custance's maids swear they will be more careful in accepting tokens for Custance in the future. Custance promises they will "abye" it if they don't. Truepenny returns but has not found Doughty.

III.i Merygreeke, having the time of his life, decides to let Custance in on his prank.

III.ii finds Merygreeke with Custance and Talkapace. Custance obviously knows Merygreeke and welcomes him as a friend. Custance discovers (upon opening the letter she was sent via Mumblecrust) that it is Doister wooing her. She considers him a fool and refuses even to consider him for husband. She hurls invective at him. Merygreeke says he will convey her message to Doister. He tells her "we will laugh well, ye shall see."

III.iii Merygreeke greets Doister and gives him Custance's stern rebuff. Doister determines to go home and die. Merygreeke builds Doister up with flattery again, though, and convinces Doister to go and win Custance, "That she may knowe she hath to answere to a man." Doister calls his musicians again and they go sing in front of Custance's door.

III.iv Custance comes out to see who is wailing at her door. She again scorns Doister and, for reason, produces the letter he sent her. Merygreeke reads it aloud, changing the punctuation in order to make the letter sound insulting-he reads "Sweete mistress, whereas I love you nothing at all, / Regarding your substance and richesse" instead of "Sweete mistress, whereas I love you--nothing at all regarding your substance and richesse" etc. Custance says she would not brunt such an insult. Doister despairs, but again Merygreeke flatters him and tells him, "If she despise you, e'en dispise ye hir againe!" He tells Doister that, if he were a woman, he would marry Doister himself. Doister agrees to avoid Custance in order to make her want him, but in the meantime he goes to find the scribe who wrote his love letter for him.

III.v is the scrivener's scene. The scrivener reads the letter as he punctuated it and thus shows himself guiltless of the misunderstanding between Doister and Custance. The Scrivener beats Doister for questioning his integrity. Doister realizes the fault lies in Merygreeke's reading of the letter. Merygreeke beats Doister for threatening him. Then Merygreeke promises to mend the mess he has made in order to make all well with Custance again.

IV.i Sym Suresby, Gawyn Goodlucke's man, has come ahead to see whether his master's mistress, Custance, is well.

IV.ii Sym meets Custance. She is eager for Goodlucke's return.

IV.iii Doister and Merygreeke accost Custance in Suresby's presence. They speak of the ring and letter, of a marriage between Doister and Custance, etc., and cause Suresby to question Custance's fidelity. Suresby leaves to go on other errands for his master. Custance upbraids Doister and orders him off. Doister promises to be revenged upon her for rejecting him. Custance sends Truepenny for Goodlucke's old friend Tristam Trusty to come to her aid.

IV.iv finds the women preparing for Doister's threatened attack. They plan to use household implements to drive the attackers away (distaff, broom, skimmer, firefork, spit).

IV.v Truepenny returns with Trusty. Custance tells Trusty what is going on-and Trusty says he heard of it from Suresby when Suresby came by. Trusty promises his aid in her struggle with Doister.

IV.vi Merygreeke enters to tell Custance that it is all a lark to make Doister look foolish. Merygreeke sets up a plan with Custance to act like he is going to hit her, but will accidentally strike Doister in the fight.

IV.vii is the arming scene. Merygreeke beats Doister again after a brief misunderstanding. Custance, as previously prepared with Merygreeke, sees Doister and his men and runs off in feigned fear. Doister is given a kitchen pot by Merygreeke to wear as a helmet.

Trusty comes forth and begs that Doister take his grievances to the law instead of fighting over them. Doister is immediately persuaded. Merygreeke has to flatter Doister again to whet his purpose to battle. Finally Doister, who is a braggart but a coward as well, decides not to fight, but to take Trusty's advice instead. Merygreeke agrees, but fires his gun supposedly to say that the battle was fought. Actually it is a signal to instigate the battle and the fun Custance and he have prepared.

IV.viii Custance and the women spill out of the house at the sound of the pistol shot and beat the men with kitchen utensils. Talkapace beats Doughty, who had lied to her about his master. Doister falls to Custance, "Out! Alas, I am slain! Helpe!" Merygreeke runs to his rescue and, in an attempt to beat Custance, constantly beats Doister, as planned. The men, defeated, retreat.

V.i finds Suresby telling the newly-arrived Goodlucke about Custance's doubtful fidelity, the ring and letter, etc. Goodlucke decides to sound her out on the matter.

V.ii Goodlucke and Suresby accost Custance. Custance tells him that it was just the fool Roister Doister who thought he was in love with her, but Goodlucke is not persuaded. She tells Goodlucke and Suresby to go to Trusty and have her story verified by him.

V.iii Custance asks the Lord to smile on her innocence.

V.iv Goodlucke and Suresby return with Trusty to Custance. Trusty has made all clear to them. Suresby is overjoyed that he was wrong about her, and she forgives him.

V.v Merygreeke and Doister accost the group. With Doister out of hearing, Merygreeke tells Goodlucke that everything was done in fun to discomfort Doister. Goodlucke thinks it is all quite funny.

V.vi Merygreeke brings Doister to the group as Goodlucke bid. He has convinced Doister that they sue for peace for fear that, having won the battle, they will be victims of Doister's vengeance. Doister, of course, believes Merygreeke's flattery and says he will show them pity. Custance gets in a Parthian shot, saying that Doister was a usurer to her, giving her one blow and requiring fifty in return. Doister and Merygreeke are invited to the nuptial feast, and all are made friends. They sing and wish health to their Queen (who is either Mary or Elizabeth depending upon when the play was revised).

Roister Doister is a Miles Gloriosus-but a cowardly braggart.

Merygreeke is the rake.

Mumblecrust is the old servant.

Talkapace is the busybody, talkative servant.

Alyface is the maidenly and good servant.

Suresby is the good servant.

Goodlucke is the handsome, well-balanced lover.

Trusty is.

The play is broken into "French" scenes. A new scene begins when a major character enters or exits the scene. Hence, many new scenes are but continuations of the scene in progress.

Two days apparently pass in the play.

The play appears to have been written around 1552 for performance before Edward VI. But the references to a Queen at the end indicates it was revised under either Mary or Elizabeth.

There is a lot of coin and money imagery here-grote, penny, Truepenny, pounds, etc.

Because Roister Doister is such a fool, and is early on associated with the Petrarchan-styled lover, it could be that this play indicates a shift from that style. It now has become something of an object of fun, to be poked and beaten on stage.

Marlowe's Edward II and Shakespeare's Richard III (for the use of a letter which is misunderstood by the receiving person-cf. also Kyd's The Spanish Tragedy, in particular the Pedringano subplot for a lesser echo of a misread (or missing) letter device).