George Chapman
ALL FOOLS
(Possibly based upon Chapman's 1599 lost play
ALL FOOLS BUT THE FOOL a.k.a.
THE WORLD RUNS ON WHEELS)

1599–1604
(see IV.i.330) (printed 1605)

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BELLANORA

Bellanora is the daughter of Gostanzo, and the beloved of Fortunio. Like Gratiana, she is unable to be with her lover because of her father, and she complains about her separation to Gazetta. However, after seeing the way Cornelio treats Gazetta, Bellanora and Gratiana agree that they would rather have no love than suffer jealousy like his. She agrees to play along with Rinaldo's scheme, and welcomes Gratiana into the house as the wife of Fortunio. She enters with the others when Cornelio has the Notary draw up papers of divorce, and asks Cornelio, in the name of gentlewomen, not to go through with the divorce. When Gostanzo first finds out that Valerio has secretly married, he announces that he is settling all his wealth on Bellanora, at which point Fortunio thanks him for making him wealthy, but Bellanora does not speak herself.

BUTLER

A "ghost character" and probably fictional. The Notary refers to the case of Butler and Cason as proof of his learning and knowledge.

BUTIOR

A "ghost character" and probably fictional. The Notary refers to the case of Butior and Caseo as proof of his learning and knowledge, but "butior and caseo" is bad Latin for "bread and cheese."

CASEO

A "ghost character" and probably fictional. The Notary refers to the case of Butior and Caseo as proof of his learning and knowledge, but "butior and caseo" is bad Latin for "bread and cheese."

CASON

A "ghost character" and probably fictional. The Notary refers to the case of Butler and Cason as proof of his learning and knowledge.

CLAUDIO

Claudio is a courtier and friend of Dariotto. When Valerio complains about the law, Claudio remarks that the greatest poet is he who rails the most. He joins in the gulling of Cornelio, asking after his wife. He enters to tell Rinaldo that Cornelio is enraged and convinced Gazetta is unfaithful and to egg on the Page in his defense of women. Claudio declares himself true in nothing but secret lechery, but when Cornelio has papers of divorce drawn up, Claudio reveals to him that Valerio has tricked him and that Gazetta is not unfaithful. He is part of the final tavern scene, although he does not speak after calling for dice.

CORNELIO

Cornelio is the husband of Gazetta and is extremely and unreasonably jealous, twisting everything anyone says into proof that Gazetta has been unfaithful. He first complains because his wife is talking to Bellanora and Gratiana, and therefore they must be plotting mischief. He then believes that her sewing indicates unfaithfulness, because she is creating a pansy (a lover's flower). He accuses Gazetta directly of having an affair with Dariotto, and when she denies it, he will not believe her. In soliloquy he claims that jealousy is the best way to control his wife and constant suspicion is the only way to be sure he is not cuckolded. With Dariotto, he then gulls Valerio into playing and singing so they can make fun of his skills. Valerio, stung, makes him believe that Gazetta is in fact having an affair with Dariotto. Cornelio is fooled and becomes incensed. When he sees Dariotto, he attacks him, wounding him, and then declaring he will be divorced. He does have a Notary draw up divorce papers and, after questioning him closely about their correctness (but with many unintended double entendres) is about to sign them when he suffers a nosebleed. He takes this as a warning to wait and dismisses both Notary and Gazetta. Claudio then tells him privately that Rinaldo and Valerio have gulled him as revenge for his own trick. Cornelio maintains that he still has good reason to be jealous, but shifts his attention to revenge. He tells Rinaldo that Valerio has been arrested for debts, and that he must bring Gostanzo to the tavern to pay the officers. Rinaldo does so and thus all the secret marriages are revealed. Cornelio then becomes the center of attention as everyone wonders if Cornelio will give up his jealousy. Gostanzo tells Cornelio that he knew Cornelio's father, and that gentleman not only looked the other way when Cornelio's mother had extramarital affairs, but would ring his doorbell and then stand and talk to his neighbor so that her lovers could leave by the back door. This, according to Gostanzo, ensured a quiet life. Cornelio then reveals that he has only been threatening divorce to tame his wife, and he claims that he is now the world will see he is as wise as his father.

CORNELIO'S FATHER

A "ghost character." Gostanzo tells Cornelio that he knew Cornelio's father, and that gentleman not only looked the other way when Cornelio's mother had extramarital affairs, but would ring his doorbell and then stand and talk to his neighbor so that her lovers could leave by the back door. This, according to Gostanzo, ensured a quiet life. After Cornelio reveals that he has only been threatening divorce to tame his wife, he claims that now the world will see that he is as wise as his father.

CORNELIO'S MOTHER

A "ghost character." Gostanzo describes Cornelio's mother as wise, but also lusty and flirtatious, and given to affairs, which her husband ignored to keep the peace.

CRATINUS

A "ghost character." The unnamed Prologus refers to Cratinus and Eupolis, a playwright contemporary to Aristophanes, as models. The Prologus argues that their satiric style is no longer appreciated, even though satire is wittier and less obscene than current comic styles.

CURIO

Curio is the name given in the character list to the Page. Although the speech headings consistently refer to him as "Page," Rinaldo uses the name once. Curio at first appears to be a standard page, delivering a message from Valerio (an imaginary message, as it turns out), and fetching an instrument when told to. However, when Cornelio declares he will be jealous, Curio suddenly declares that he wishes to speak in defense of Gazetta, since she is not there. His defense of her (and of women in general) is, first, that women cannot help their natures, since they are born disloyal, second, that if she strays, it must be because Cornelio is wanting in some way, third, women, like the sea, are calm until stirred up by outside turmoil and, finally, that the cuckold is an imaginary creature and no man is a cuckold, except those that have wives. His speeches, as might be expected, only infuriate Cornelio the more. Later, when Cornelio threatens to divorce Gazetta, Curio says that if he is actually a cuckold, he should not announce it with a public divorce. In the final tavern scene, Curio discusses tobacco with Valerio.

DAN CORNUTO

Dan Cornuto is a derogatory nickname Valerio uses for Cornelio after discovering that the latter has made fun of him. "Cornuto"–cuckold–refers to Cornelio's jealousy.

DARIOTTO

Dariotto is a courtier, famous for his many affairs with married women. Cornelio accuses Gazetta of having an affair with him, which she denies as completely false. Despite this, Cornelio appears to be friendly with Dariotto, since they conspire together to make him believe he can play and sing beautifully, and then tease him about his lack of skill. This changes after Valerio makes Cornelio believe his wife really has been unfaithful with Dariotto. Dariotto claims that he seeks only the consent of a woman, not the actual affair, and that he has not attempted to win Gazetta at all. Nevertheless, Cornelio attacks him and wounds him. Pock, the surgeon is brought in, and pronounces the wound shallow, and invites Dariotto to dinner. He is present when Cornelio has the Notary draw up divorce papers, but does not attempt to defend Gazetta. In the final tavern scene, Dariotto is part of the early merriment, calling for dice and pledging a toast to the women on his knees, but once Marc Antonio, Gostanzo and Cornelio enter, he has no more lines.

DRAWER

The Drawer, in the final scene, sets up the stage as a tavern and then promises to bring Valerio as much music and tobacco as he can.

DUCHESS

A "ghost character." Gostanzo, appalled by Valerio's apparent shyness around women, reminisces about his youth, when, at twenty-five, he was able to entertain the Duchess with courtly bows, talking and dances. He even claims he could have written verse, if needed.

DUKE ANONIMO

A "ghost character" and probably fictional. The Notary refers to the case the duke as proof of his learning and knowledge, but "anonimo" is Latin for "anonymous."

EPILOGUE

An unnamed character speaks the Epilogue. In it he states that the play is dedicated to the audience, but since different people have different tastes, he cannot be assured that anyone enjoyed it. The Epilogue ends by stating that the actors will bring the audience meat and stools, and that all are "welcome", but the implied rhyme clearly indicates that all are, in fact, "fools."

EUPOLIS

A "ghost character." The unnamed Prologus refers to Eupolis and Cratinus, a playwright contemporary to Aristophanes, as models. The Prologus argues that their satiric style is no longer appreciated, even though satire is wittier and less obscene than current comic styles.

FORTUNIO

Fortunio is the eldest son of Marc Antonio and is secretly in love with Bellanora. He agrees to play along Rinaldo's game and pretends to be married to Gratiana and forced out of the house by Marc Antonio. He and Gratiana take refuge in Gostanzo's house, where Fortunio pretends to take Gostanzo's advice on how to win back his father's approval. Meanwhile, he takes the opportunity to spend time with his actual beloved, Bellanora. Luckily, Gostanzo mistakes their discussion as an attempt by Bellanora to persuade Fortunio to obey his father. When Gostanzo first finds out that Valerio has secretly married, he announces that he is settling all his wealth on Bellanora, at which point Fortunio thanks him for making him wealthy, since they have secretly married. He then urges Gostanzo not to be angry since he himself invited Fortunio to his house and supported his supposed marriage to Gratiana.

GAZETTA

Gazetta is the wife of Cornelio. She complains to Bellanora and Gratiana that her love for Cornelio has been smothered and destroyed by his jealousy. When Cornelio finds Gazetta sewing, he accuses her of unfaithfulness because she chooses to sew pansies, which are for lovers. When her husband accuses her outright of being unfaithful with Dariotto, she declares that she loved Cornelio when she married him and loves him still. He is unconvinced and tells her to get in. She tries to defend herself further when Cornelio has the Notary draw up divorce papers, but he tells her to keep silent, which she does. She is present in the final scene, when her husband reveals that he has threatened divorce only to control her, but she does not respond to that, or to his statement that he allowed Dariotto access to his house and saw the in bed together without reaction, because it was part of his plot. This leaves open the question of who is telling the truth, since both Dariotto and Gazetta state that they did not engage in an affair.

GOSTANZO

Gostanzo is the father of Valerio and Bellanora. He is continuously involved in plots, not understanding that he is actually being gulled himself. He believes Valerio is a hard working, shy young man who only cares for profit. When Rinaldo tells him that Fortunio is secretly married, he immediately tells Marc Antonio, and tries to make his friend turn against his son for his disobedience. At the same time, however, he welcomes Fortunio and Gratiana (supposedly married) into his house and tells them he will attempt to calm Marc Antonio, while commenting that Gratiana should look on him as a second husband. Gostanzo is further gulled when Rinaldo agrees to have Valerio and Gratiana present themselves to Marc Antonio as married (which is true, but he believes it is just a trick). Gostanzo then tells Marc Antonio that this was his idea and to play along with the joke. He then pretends to first browbeat and then forgive his son, swearing he has no objection to their marriage. In the final scene, when he is confronted with the truth, he is reminded of this oath. In anger, he states that he will settle his entire estate on his daughter Bellanora, at which point Fortunio thanks him for making him wealthy, and reveals that he has married Bellanora. Caught by all the tricks, Gostanzo has no choice but to accept both matches. He then turns to Cornelio and lectures him about jealousy, stating that he knew Cornelio's father, and that gentleman not only looked the other way when Cornelio's mother had extramarital affairs, but would ring his doorbell and then stand and talk to his neighbor so that her lovers could leave by the back door. This, according to Gostanzo, ensured a quiet life.

GOSTANZO'S FATHER

A "ghost character." Gostanzo, appalled by Valerio's apparent shyness around woman, reminisces about his youth, when, at twenty-five, he was able to entertain the Duchess, who was invited to the house by Gostanzo's father.

GRATIANA

Gratiana is the daughter of Marc Antonio and is secretly married to Valerio. Like Bellanora, she is unable to be with her husband because of his father, and she complains about her separation to Gazetta. However, after seeing the way Cornelio treats Gazetta, Bellanora and Gratiana agree that they would rather have no love than suffer jealousy like his. She agrees to play along with Rinaldo's scheme, and pretends to be Fortunio's wife so that they can seek refuge in Gostanzo's house. This allows Fortunio to see Bellanora regularly, and for Valerio and Gratiana to meet regularly. After Gostanzo sees Valerio kissing and complimenting Gratiana, he becomes worried that Gratiana is deceiving Fortunio. Following Rinaldo's suggestion, Valerio and Gratiana now pretend to be married and go to Marc Antonio's house, where Gostanzo pretends first to be angry and then to forgive them (not realizing that they are, in fact, married). Gratiana is present when Cornelio has divorce papers drawn up, but does not say anything. Nor does she speak in the final scene, when all is revealed.

KYTE

Kyte is the name given in the character list to the Notary. Otherwise unused.

MARC ANTONIO

Marc Antonio is the father of Fortunio and Rinaldo. He is a gentle, quiet man; when Gostanzo tells him that Fortunio is secretly married, he plans to forgive him, saying that one word from his son would completely destroy his anger. Gostanzo is appalled by this lack of authority and lectures him severely on how he should treat his son, and the consequences if he does not. Marc Antonio is involved in further plots when Gostanzo tells him that they are all to pretend that Valerio and Gratiana are married (neither of the older men realize this is the truth), so that Gostanzo can show how a wayward son should be treated. Marc Antonio agrees to all the tricks without complaint, but when all is revealed, he mocks Gostanzo for being too wise and ending up caught in his own traps.

MAST COURTIER

Mast (or Master) Courtier is a derogatory nickname Valerio uses for Dariotto after discovering that the latter has made fun of him.

NOTARY

This character is named Kyte in the dramatis persona but the name is not otherwise used in the play. The Notary is hired by Cornelio to draw up divorce papers. Cornelio declares that he has the right to hang Gazetta and her lover, to which the Notary responds that he cannot legally hang his wife. After a debate about whether or not Gazette has stolen his honor and other concerns about the correctness of the divorce papers (with many unintended double entendres), the Notary has convinced Cornelio that they are perfect. Cornelio is about to sign them when he suffers a nosebleed. He takes this as a warning to wait and tells the Notary to keep both papers and wife in his house. Valerio tells him to use Gazetta kindly, which the Notary promises to do.

PAGE

Valerio's Page is identified in the character list and once by Rinaldo as "Curio." Since he has a more developed personality than most characters identified only by their titles, the full character description is listed under CURIO.

POCK

Pock is a surgeon fetched to treat Dariotto after Cornelio wounds him. Rinaldo and Valerio make several jokes concerning Pock's name. Pock states that the wound is not serious and how quickly he would have it cured. When Dariotto asks, surprised, if he can control how long it takes to heal a wound, Pock responds that medicine works like law, and can be lengthened or shortened at will. He then invites Dariotto to dinner and they go off to Pock's house.

PROLOGUS

An unnamed character speaks the Prologus, or prologue. The speaker first complains that satire and true wit is rejected in favor of broad comedy and obscene jests, but then finishes claiming that the audience always has final say and the actors must submit to their judgment, which never errs.

RINALDO

Rinaldo is the youngest son of Marc Antonio. He has been disappointed in love and therefore refuses to ever love again. Instead, he spends his time creating schemes and tricking other people. He tells Gostanzo that Fortunio is the one married to Gratiana, instead of revealing the truth, that it is Gostanzo's own son Valerio. He then persuades Fortunio, Valerio and Gratiana to play along, promising that, in the end, both men will have their fathers' approval of their matches. When Gostanzo sees Valerio kissing Gratiana, Rinaldo suggests to him that they pretend the two are married to fool Marc Antonio, but in reality, Gostanzo is the one who is tricked into accepting the marriage. Rinaldo also helps Valerio take revenge on Cornelio for making him look foolish. Rinaldo helps Valerio convince Cornelio that Gazetta is unfaithful, and this almost leads to their divorce. Rinaldo himself is gulled, however, when Cornelio convinces him that Valerio is arrested for unpaid debts, and is convinced to bring Gostanzo and Marc Antonio to the tavern, ostensibly to pay the officers, but in reality to discover the truth about all the young people. Although all ends happily, Rinaldo comments to himself that he is stupid for being so easily fooled.

RYNALDO

An alternate spelling of Rinaldo, used in the original Quarto.

VALERIO

Valerio is the son of Gostanzo. He is a wastrel, in debt, interested only in gambling, drinking and women, but he has convinced his father that he is a dutiful hard working merchant who has never had a drink and is actually afraid of women. He is secretly married to Gratiana, but realizes his father will disown him if he reveals he has married without permission. He agrees to take part in Rinaldo's scheme and when Fortunio and Gratiana (pretending to be the married couple) arrive at Gostanzo's house, he pretends he cannot even look at Gratiana. However, his father later catches him kissing Gratiana. Rinaldo convinces Gostanzo to play a trick on Marc Antonio by pretending that it is Valerio and Gratiana who are married, and that he is enraged. Valerio plays the repentant son, even going so far as offering to divorce Gratiana and live with the sin of perjury to make his father happy. At this, Gostanzo forgives him and claims that the marriage is acceptable to him. Valerio is gulled himself when Cornelio and Dariotto trick him into believing he is a talented musician and then lack and mock him when he plays and sings. He vows revenge on them and makes Cornelio believe that Dariotto is having an affair with Cornelio's wife Gazetta, leading to Cornelio wounding Dariotto and attempting to divorce Gazetta. Valerio does not attempt to set any of this right, but in the end, all the tricks are revealed and Valerio reminds his father of his vow to accept the marriage, so Gostanzo has no choice but to do so. After Cornelio is lectured on his jealousy and claims that it has merely been a way to control his wife, Valerio stands on a chair and gives a very long and undramatic prose speech in praise of cuckolds.

Synopsis:

I.i: Rinaldo, disenchanted by love and vowing to live a Machiavel, talks to his elder brother Fortunio. They discuss the current state of affairs. Valerio, whose father believes him to be a virtuous son, has secretly married his love--a beautiful but poor girl named Gratiana. Additionally, Fortunio is in love with Valerio's sister Bellanora. The problem is Valerio and Bellanora's father, Gostanzo. He wants his children to marry well and has forbidden Fortunio to court Bellanora (even though Gostanzo has a best friend in Marc Antonio, the father to Fortunio and Rinaldo).

Valerio enters and boasts of how he has deceived his father into believing that he is a pious and dutiful son when in fact he is a rioter and has secretly married Gratiana.

When Gostanzo enters, everyone leaves but Rinaldo. Rinaldo, playing the Machiavel, tells Gostanzo that his brother Fortunio has secretly married Gratiana. Gostanzo gloats that Marc Antonio would be so deceived in his son. Gostanzo is proud that this calamity did not befall his son Valerio, who is too shy (he believes) even to look at a woman.

When Marc Antonio enters, Gostanzo (even though he promised to keep secret not a moment earlier) tells Marc Antonio of Fortunio's deception. Marc Antonio takes the news with good grace, which inflames Gostanzo. Gostanzo instructs Marc Antonio to act enraged and so keep Fortunio from further mischief. Marc Antonio agrees to allow Fortunio and Gratiana to live with Gostanzo while he pretends to be displeased with his son. Gostanzo assures him that Valerio's example will work a change for the better on Fortunio.

Gostanzo then returns to Rinaldo (who has secretly heard the whole conversation) and tells him that Marc Antonio is enraged by the news. Gostanzo claims it is common knowledge throughout Florence, claiming that Antonio had already heard of Fortunio's marriage. He tells Rinaldo to have Fortunio and Gratiana come live at Gostanzo's until Marc Antonio settles down.

Rinaldo sees this as an opportunity to gull the proud Gostanzo and goes to tell Fortunio and Valerio how he has arranged to have both men live under the same roof with their lovers.

I.ii: The three women, Gratiana, Bellanora, and Gazetta bemoan their lot. Gratiana is married to Valerio but cannot live with him. Bellanora loves Fortunio, but Gostanzo forbids them to meet. Gazetta is married to Cornelio, a jealous man newly risen in court, who brings courtiers home to entertain them and then upbraids her for being seen in their company.

Cornelio enters and orders Gazetta into the house.

Valerio and Fortunio enter and embrace Gratiana and Bellanora. Rinaldo enters and tells them how he has arranged their future happiness. But he admonishes them to behave in front of Gostanzo as if it is Fortunio and Gratiana who are married.

II.i: Gostanzo again encourages Marc Antonio to behave as if he is angry with Fortunio about the marriage. Marc Antonio is reluctant, but agrees. Gostanzo has Marc Antonio hide to overhear his discussion with Valerio. Valerio enters in a pose of pure virtue, telling a page to trouble him no longer, that he will not bail a friend for his gambling debts. Gostanzo approves of his son's virtue. Fortunio enters with Rinaldo and Gratiana. Fortunio acts surprised that his father should have reacted badly to the news of his "marriage." Gostanzo bids Valerio to welcome Fortunio and Gratiana to their house. Valerio welcomes Fortunio, but he behaves bashfully and will not kiss Gratiana. Bellanora enters and welcomes them into the home.

When the children leave, Gostanzo boasts to Marc Antonio that he has a virtuous and dutiful son.

Valerio and Rinaldo congratulate themselves for their success in the plot. They see Cornelio and Gazetta enter and discuss his ill-reasoned jealousy of her over the courtier Dariotto. Cornelio wrongly believes that she is cuckolding him with Dariotto.

After the couple leaves, Dariotto enters and teases Valerio about his wit at deceiving his father Gostanzo. We learn that Valerio has great gambling debts and has recently fought his way out of an army of creditors, lawyers, and sergeants. The courtiers flatter Valerio into plying the theorbo and singing. When Valerio does, and does it badly, they make fun of him and laugh at the ease with which Valerio is gulled by flattery. Valerio tells Rinaldo that he will be revenged for this embarrassment.

III.i: Gostanzo watches the lovers in Gostanzo's house. He is surprised to see his son Valerio embracing Gratiana. He believes his son is a fast learner and is about to cuckold his friend Fortunio. When he tells Rinaldo about his fears, Rinaldo comes up with a plan. Gostanzo is to send Gratiana to Marc Antonio's house on the pretext of learning that she is really Valerio's wife. To keep the pretext strong, Fortunio is to remain at Gostanzo's house and Valerio is to be allowed to "secretly" sneak out and meet Gratiana at Marc Antonio's. Gostanzo thinks it will be an excellent jest on old Antonio.

In the meantime, Valerio has told Cornelio that Dariotto is indeed cuckolding him. Cornelio is at the point of divorcing Gazetta. Valerio is now trying to dissuade Cornelio from divorcing. A Page exclaims that women cannot help themselves from cuckolding their husbands, which only enrages Cornelio the more, and Cornelio runs off to kill Dariotto. When the innocent Dariotto enters, he tells Valerio that he only likes the chase--he has no desire to taste forbidden fruits, only to seek them. The danger in the hunt is all he really longs for, not the quarry.

The enraged Cornelio enters and wounds Dariotto. A surgeon is fetched. The surgeon, Pock, takes Dariotto to his house for treatment.

Rinaldo tells Valerio of the bizarre turn of events at Gostanzo's. They are now "pretending" that Gratiana is Valerio's wife, and she will be living with Marc Antonio under that pretense. Valerio looks forward to further gulling his father with his secret bride.

IV.i: Gostanzo, unable to take the ribbing of Marc Antonio that Valerio has really deceived him, tells Marc Antonio that the whole reason that Gratiana is being moved to his house is to keep her from cuckolding Fortunio. He tells Marc Antonio to keep the deception alive and pretend that he believes Valerio is the husband (as the children "pretend" now).

Rinaldo says that Gostanzo has proof that Gratiana is a noble maid. He says that Gostanzo had tried her virtue earlier in his house and had been rebuffed. Valerio enters and begs his father's blessing in the marriage. Gostanzo, still believing the whole scene to be a ruse, gives Valerio his wholehearted blessing for the marriage. Valerio is left to wonder, "Gull'd I my father, or gull'd he himself?"

Cornelio enters with Gazetta and a Notary for the divorce. Just when he is ready to sign the bill of divorce his nose bleeds, which he takes to be an omen and refuses to sign the paper. He has the Notary take Gazetta and the bill of divorce to his house for safekeeping. Claudio, a courtier, privately tells Cornelio that Gazetta has not been untrue to him, that the whole thing is a fabrication by Valerio and Rinaldo. Cornelio promises to gull the gullers.

V.i: Cornelio tells Rinaldo that Valerio has been arrested for debt. Because both Rinaldo and Cornelio are guarantors of Valerio's debt they stand to lose substantially by his arrest. Also, because they are parties in interest, they cannot themselves go to bail Valerio. He has Rinaldo run to Gostanzo, asking to meet him at the Half Moon Tavern where Valerio is being held until bail can be raised. Rinaldo runs for Gostanzo. Cornelio gloats that his plan is working.

V.ii: At the Half Moon Tavern Valerio is gambling and drinking heavily. Rinaldo brings Gostanzo in, unseen. Cornelio enters to watch the fun. Rinaldo, seeing that Valerio is not in custody, chastises himself for being gulled by Cornelio into exposing his friend to his father. Gostanzo halts the merriment and expresses indignation at his son's behavior. Marc Antonio enters. He tells Gostanzo of his certain knowledge that Gratiana is Valerio's wife indeed. The enraged Gostanzo swears he will leave all his belongings to Belladora. When Fortunio thanks him for the benefice and tells him that he has married Belladora secretly, Gostanzo sees that he cannot control his children and good-naturedly gives in to their gulling of him and accepts them into his good graces again.

They then turn their attention to Cornelio and try to convince him not to divorce. They tell him that his mother cuckolded his father, and she was nonetheless a virtuous and well-respected woman; his father had the wisdom to go out of his way NOT to catch her in the act. They assure him that it is better in this world to live in a fool's paradise, allowing oneself to be deceived in those areas one wishes to be deceived, than it is to play the jealous ass.

Cornelio then makes a shocking statement. He acts jealous so he may ensure his wife's unfaithfulness. By spicing the forbidden fruit with the danger of his feigned wrath he is assured of drawing fools such as Dariotto into his wife's bed--all this to "bridle her stout stomach"--that is, to relieve himself of the husband's duty. He is weary of her insatiable lust. He is commended by all for his wisdom.

Valerio, horribly drunk, delivers a long exegesis upon the latest age--the HORNED AGE (falling after the first six ages of the world, golden; silver; brass; iron; leaden; and wooden.)

Gostanzo ends by saying, "Horns cannot be kept off with jealousy."

Characterization:

All the characters, as the title suggests, are fools. They are each self-deluded, but can see the delusion only in the people around them.

Valerio thinks he is a wise schemer, but he can barely keep a step ahead of his father and is easily gulled by the flattery of the courtiers.

Gostanzo thinks he is a wholly wise man, but he is gulled by Valerio (in both demeanor and marriage), Belladora (in marrying Fortunio), by Fortunio, Gratiana, and Rinaldo.

Gostanzo gulls Marc Antonio, but he is easy-going and apparently does not mind surprises. He is the complacent fool in the play.

Rinaldo believes he is the perfect Machiavel, twisting others to his will, but in the end Cornelio gulls him into betraying Valerio's secret life to Gostanzo.

Cornelio is gulled into believing Gazetta is cuckolding him, though his final speech (depending upon whether one believes him or not) either makes him out to be a wittol-fool or a gulled fool (who is only trying to save face).

Gazetta is gulled into believing that Cornelio really is jealous and means divorce.

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Notes of Interest:

This play is considered by many critics to be Chapman's finest comedy. It deals more with characters than with plot--and Chapman's notorious shunning of plot is here overcome to make an interesting, well-integrated structure.

As in Widow's Tears, Chapman enjoys examining the human necessity of self-deception. In both plays he seems to say that the only way to be happy is by not looking into the truth of things.

At II.i.170-79 Chapman could be using the foolish Gostanzo's voice to express his own feelings that the state of poetry had declined greatly from the Elizabethan golden age, or even from classical antiquity, to the time when he was writing (1599). Then again, one must keep the speaker in mind--it could also be a foolish statement made by a foolish man and no more.

Rinaldo's self-deception that he is the "Machiavel" of the play (as he boldly announces at II.i.201) is Chapman's conscious parody of the other playwrights who tap into that popular vein and end up producing foolish villains unwittingly.

The entire play has a misogynistic tone. Woman hating is most evident in the page's speeches in III.i, but the whole structure lends itself to a certain hatred of women. Gazetta is not to be trusted despite her protestations of faithfulness (even where it is not deserved). Gratiana is a pawn with no wit of her own in the schemes involving her. Bellanora might be as duplicitous as Valerio in her marriage to Fortunio, but her character is not developed enough to tell. Even a character who doesn't appear--Cornelio's mother--is a notable whore who cuckolded his father to the town's general knowledge.

"Gulling" is the operative word in this play--everyone is out to gull everyone else in this play. Everyone is a fool, as the title suggests, and fools are best at gulling. A simple word-count of "gull" and its forms in this play would prove an interesting exercise.

"Cuckoldry" and "horns" would prove to be the other most mentioned motif in this play, I believe.

Chapman, at V.ii.16, seems to have nodded by placing the Rialto in Florence. It could be that Valerio is so drunk that he does not notice this slip, and thus may be intended by Chapman, but it seems highly unlikely that even drunk a man would mistake areas from other cities as being part of his hometown.

The changes in action are rather poorly (that is, artificially) accomplished. A change from one plot to another generally consists of one character saying "I wonder what that subplot character is up to--oh, here he comes now" and the subplot then taking its next step. This device is especially apparent at IV.i. 220-230 et seq.

Plays to be compared:

Greene's Friar Bacon and Friar Bungay (for the mention of Ladon, the dragon of the Hesperides, whom Bungay conjures at one point, in Fools at I.i.166);

Middleton and Rowley's The Changeling (for the mention of barley break--an important image in C--at I.ii.67);

Gascoigne's Supposes and Shakespeare's The Taming of the Shrew (for a similar situation in lying to father figures so as to hide romantic inclinations towards their daughters, etc.);

Mankind (for the suggestion of "dancing in nets" at II.i.252 relating to Titivilius's net of invisibility/deception);

Middleton's The Revenger's Tragedy (for the line echo at II.i.355-57 telling the country man to sell his rural estate to settle in the city); Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet (for the line echoes at III.i.349-50, cf. Mercutio's death);

Marston's The Fawn and Jonson's Every Man in His Humour (for the similarity between the jealous husband plots of Cornelio and Zuccone and Kitely);

Shakespeare's As You Like It (for the vague similarity between Jacques's "7 ages of man" speech and Valerio's "7 ages of the world" speech at V.ii.236 et seq.--a weak parody if one is intended at all).

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